Mar 22, 2021

Disabilitiy Dating

 



Internet dating has made dating easier for everyone including people who struggle with dating and may have visible or invisible disabilities. As a mother with two children with disabilities, I have wondered what their life will be like growing up. 

Luckily the world seems to be more understanding and more adapting to those who have visible and invisible disabilities, or even if you are older, there is a website called  dating for disabled seniors meaning that there are much more choices available when they do want to date. There are a number of places you can visit you might not have been aware of. This includes places like theme parks, restaurants, cinema and holidays that have made sure that they have included disabilities in the services they provide. Here in the UK, it's actually illegal to do discriminate against disabilities. It's not just limited to dating either, as the places tend to want to date are also places you visit as a family and people of all ages are able to attend. Even bowling alleys have designed facilities to make sure everyone is able to be included. To find out what is available in your local area then google is a fantastic place to help find places to visit for dates, and also whats assessable to disabilities and help that there might be, the easiest place to arrive, where the lifts are etc. There is a lot of people who might be ex-soldiers or marines who may have sadly been left disabled due to service and may struggle to meet someone or someone who may have been badly hurt in a car accident, luckily there is a website called amputee dating app, which enables them to be honest about their disability without the need to feel pre-judged as people on the app are aware it's for people with disabilities. I have heard some sad stories over the years about people who have struggled and been judged regarding their disability. 

I happened to stumble on a YouTube video where I found a video called Living In An Interabled Relationship with Jenna Farmer. This was very informative and there was a large range of videos that covered a range of topics and would be helpful, to anyone that has a disability and looking for advice and body, disability positivity. We often feel alone in this world and it's always great to know that there are people around that may stuffer from either the same disabilities, illness or mental illness that we have, that may also feel the same way we do and share the same thoughts. 

 some ideas I recommend to meet once you have met someone for the first date is - 

  • Park - This can be somewhere you know is easily assessable and know how to get to, this should also make things feel stress-free as you have been there before and have plenty of space to move around, and nowhere things are. 
  • Local restaurant or cafe - Call ahead and arrange somewhere that will be easy to sit, tell the cafe or restaurant your disability and if they need to make sure that you are able to walk to your table, or use your mobility chair etc. Also if you want to move out of your chair that there is space to store it. ( even as a parent I get frustrated when I can nearly move with the pushchair). 
  • A plan - if the plan is just to meet for one of the above, then make sure you have a rough idea about times and allow yourself enough time for travel, and work out if you need public transport the easiest way and which bus or train station offers disability help ( I have seen people struggle when the railway stop they have does not have lifts to get to the other platform, and again experienced it myself with a baby).